March 28th, 2003

scared, trapped

not that the folks involved in this situation are going to give a damn, but I had to get it out.

I have a bad headache, and I'm typing this through this blinding headache, and I really should go to bed, but there's an interesting thought here.

It's always interesting when a person spills vitriol all over another, and then turns around and demands an apology from the person he/she spilt said vitriol all over. Or is hurt because the other person reacted badly to this splashing anger all over the place.

it's interesting when the vitriol slinging person's SO gets cause and effect mixed up. (And as for whether this would be tolerated, well, teachers tell students to 'ignore bullies' all the time, so there's something that's a bit wrong too.)

And while I think the person who got the vitriol spilt all over him isn't completely blameless in the whole matter, and he's already got my reasons, I'll remind the two people of this fact:

All this wouldn't have happened if I hadn't existed. (Because the person forgot because he wasn't reminded, and as to why he needed reminding, well...I was the one in another suicidal depression when this happened. I've said this before. I don't think anybody heard me.) And y'know, despite this, neither the vitriol slinger or his/her SO gave a damn about me then, and they're not giving a damn about me now. It's more and more feeding on me when I'm trying to make a decision about completely and utterly disconnecting from the 'Net anyway.

And there's a few words the Good Lord said about humility and turning the other cheek here, but I'll just stay away from that. I'm not sure it would mean anything to people anyway.

when I've chucked people off my default view for hurting me, I really ought to avoid their journals. Especially when I'm in as crappy of a mood as I am right now.

My apologies to all those who think this seems apperantly random, I'm noodling about a situation I don't want to name names in. One that obviously hurts, and one that I don't think will do any good, and yeah. all of that. But it's a nice bitter disappointment I'm feeling about the whole thing.
  • Current Mood
    disappointed disappointed