July 17th, 2004

scared, trapped


Okay, I'm taking a break from packing and cleaning, none of which I'm really happy about at the moment. Next step is to go put all the dishes in boxes, and then I will be mostly done, other than last minute spotcleanage, which is stuff like cleaning under the bed and that. I have two hours to accomplish all of this. Yay.

Last night was a mess, I got nothing done after my folks called because I just really felt quite fscked. I hate packing, and I really want sleep at the moment, because I slept from 11:30 to just before five this morning. not enough, and that's going to wreak holy havoc with my head. But too late now. No sleeping until I get home.

The rules thing kinda sucks, yeah. I know some of them are because of what mom's going through, but that doesn't make it suck any less, really. (For those not in the know, the second half of the stem cell transplant went off without a hitch on Tuesday, and we're waiting for her counts to fall through the floor. And when she gets home, she's still going to be very ill. Which is half the reason I was moving back home in the first place, at the time we thought my kid sister would be in college in the fall. She ended up getting academic dismissal, though.)

Anyway, to make a long story short, it's hard to clean and pack, because I feel like I'm packing to go to prison. And it's all stupid and my head shouldn't be this fscked up over the whole thing, but..

anyway, that's what's up. and I have to get back to work now.
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